soon im going to australia maybe this month of july.I was been sponsored by my mom.
Plan is to find a job there. What do you think the best job i can go?
I have experience in operating a rides. I work before in entertainment park as ride operator and i studied here A.C.T (Associate Computer Technolgy) but im not graduate yet i stopped because my papers was approved but im waiting for my medical results because i failed to have a flight before my medical got expired.Im a Filipino here
Help advice job seekers in australia soon?
The main entertainment parks are on the gold coast, Dreamworld, seaworld, movie world etc..
http://www.themeparks.com.au/?content=vi...
apart from that try seaching on :::
https://jobsearch.gov.au
http://www.mycareer.com.au
http://www.seek.com.au
http://nowhiring.com.au/JobSeeker/Defaul...
http://www.careersonline.com.au
http://www.workingin-australia.com
http://www.workpermit.com/australia/relo...
Reply:Mate I can honestly say that Filipinos are some of the hardest working people on this earth because they know where they come from and know how to apreciate things. Now to answer your question you will at first depending on your luck can easily find many labour jobs. If you can speak good english then your helping yourself out alot.
Depending on what part of Australia you live in the bigger cities are your best bet for work because there is alot of employment to be gained. I know alot of new arrived Filipino's who usually start of being either cleaners, kitchen hands and production line workers. All decent paying work but just don't expect to be in a job that will be paying alot straight away. You will most likely get a good job after you have gained citizenship and have gained some sort of creditation in a specific field.
Hope that helped.
Reply:if you are prepared to do anything, waiter,cleaner etc the jobs some of our youth wont do, then you will have no trouble getting work. fruit pickers are very hard to come by especially in the northern territory. good luck.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Synthesis of a repressible enzyme is inhibit by?
A. repressor alone bound to operator.
B. substrate bound to repressor
C. substrate bound to promoter.
D. corepressor and repressor binding to operator.
E. None of the choices are correct
Which one is right? Need some help!!! Please!!!
Synthesis of a repressible enzyme is inhibit by?
a
floral
B. substrate bound to repressor
C. substrate bound to promoter.
D. corepressor and repressor binding to operator.
E. None of the choices are correct
Which one is right? Need some help!!! Please!!!
Synthesis of a repressible enzyme is inhibit by?
a
floral
Computer questions HELP????
1) quicktime streaming technology is best described as a:
A) auxiliary program to enable downloading data faster from the internet
B) plug-in application for playing large audio and video files from the internet
C) an optional feature of windows that lets you speed-up searches on your hard drive
D) accelerator that increases the clock speed of the CPU
2) a mouse pointer that resembles a hand with a pointing index finger means that you:
A) are in the process of downloading a file from the internet
B) have previously visited that particular document on the web
C) can type text at that point
D) can click at that point to "jump" to a different web page
3) when you include the words AND, OR ,or NOT along with keywords in a web search you are using:
A) augmentation
B) "what if" scenarios
C) hierarchical queries
D) boolean operators
Computer questions HELP????
B) plug-in application for playing large audio and video files from the internet
D) can click at that point to "jump" to a different web page
D) boolean operators
Reply:B, D, B
~DC~
Reply:Didn't do your homework eh? I'm kind of surprised, i thought young folks were all tech savvy? ;-)
3 - B
Reply:B
D
D-http://training.proquest.com/trc/trainin...
Reply:Sounds like a test or homework assignment that your trying to have someone else give you the answers instead of learning them yourself.
Reply:B
D
B
Reply:q1. is b
q2. is b
q3. is a
A) auxiliary program to enable downloading data faster from the internet
B) plug-in application for playing large audio and video files from the internet
C) an optional feature of windows that lets you speed-up searches on your hard drive
D) accelerator that increases the clock speed of the CPU
2) a mouse pointer that resembles a hand with a pointing index finger means that you:
A) are in the process of downloading a file from the internet
B) have previously visited that particular document on the web
C) can type text at that point
D) can click at that point to "jump" to a different web page
3) when you include the words AND, OR ,or NOT along with keywords in a web search you are using:
A) augmentation
B) "what if" scenarios
C) hierarchical queries
D) boolean operators
Computer questions HELP????
B) plug-in application for playing large audio and video files from the internet
D) can click at that point to "jump" to a different web page
D) boolean operators
Reply:B, D, B
~DC~
Reply:Didn't do your homework eh? I'm kind of surprised, i thought young folks were all tech savvy? ;-)
3 - B
Reply:B
D
D-http://training.proquest.com/trc/trainin...
Reply:Sounds like a test or homework assignment that your trying to have someone else give you the answers instead of learning them yourself.
Reply:B
D
B
Reply:q1. is b
q2. is b
q3. is a
Math Question????? Help Please?? 10 Points Best Answer?
Hiring a bulldozer and operator costs $360 plus a variable cost that is a funtion of the number of hours worked. The cost is $26 - 4.05x, where x is the number of hours. The total cost of hiring a bulldozer and operator is given by the function C(x) = $360 + 26x - 4.05x^2. For what value of x will this function be maximized?
[a] x = 6.5
[b] x = 3
[c] x = 5.5
[d] x = 2
Please show me how to do this.
Math Question????? Help Please?? 10 Points Best Answer?
For maximum profit you should use this formula :
-b/2a
-26/2(-4.05)
26/8.1
Is about 3.2.
Seems like b works!
Reply:$360 + 26x - 4.05x^2
take the derivative and set equal to zero
26 - 8.1x = 0
- 8.1x = -26
x = 26/8.1 = 3.2
b is the answer.
[a] x = 6.5
[b] x = 3
[c] x = 5.5
[d] x = 2
Please show me how to do this.
Math Question????? Help Please?? 10 Points Best Answer?
For maximum profit you should use this formula :
-b/2a
-26/2(-4.05)
26/8.1
Is about 3.2.
Seems like b works!
Reply:$360 + 26x - 4.05x^2
take the derivative and set equal to zero
26 - 8.1x = 0
- 8.1x = -26
x = 26/8.1 = 3.2
b is the answer.
Help with an electromagnetic radiation concept question, please?
One of the first radar devices developed during WWII used microwave radiation of a wavelength that triggers the rotation of water molecules. This was an unfortunate coincidence because
a. it heated up the air around the machine
b. caused diseases in the operators of the radar
c. absorption of microwave radiation by water in the atmosphere interferes with the detection of intended objects
d. was necessary to shield the radar to protect people around it from harmful microwaves that could interact with the water in their bodies
Help with an electromagnetic radiation concept question, please?
(b) seems dubious and (a) unlikely, but both (c) and (d) are plausible. I think it's more likely to be (c), though - I haven't heard of anyone injured by the radar installations.
Reply:d
a. it heated up the air around the machine
b. caused diseases in the operators of the radar
c. absorption of microwave radiation by water in the atmosphere interferes with the detection of intended objects
d. was necessary to shield the radar to protect people around it from harmful microwaves that could interact with the water in their bodies
Help with an electromagnetic radiation concept question, please?
(b) seems dubious and (a) unlikely, but both (c) and (d) are plausible. I think it's more likely to be (c), though - I haven't heard of anyone injured by the radar installations.
Reply:d
Membershio in which of the following groups will allow you to move accounts in Active Directory?
a. Account Operators
b. Domain Admins
c. Enterprise Admins
d. All of the above
Membershio in which of the following groups will allow you to move accounts in Active Directory?
b and c
daisy
b. Domain Admins
c. Enterprise Admins
d. All of the above
Membershio in which of the following groups will allow you to move accounts in Active Directory?
b and c
daisy
Trivia put your knowledge to the test?
1.constucted articles from peices of wood?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
2.who provided colonist with building material?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
3.who turned valuable metal into items such as candlesticks,bowls platters coffee and teapots and sets of tableware?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
4.produced bottles, window panes and fine silverware?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
5.. who manufactured 2- wheeled used in farming and transporting freight?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
Trivia put your knowledge to the test?
1)B Barrel maker
2)E
3)D
4)c%26amp;d
5)G
Reply:A cooper produced churns, tubs, casks, barrels, buckets, and pails, often made of cedar or pine. A cartwright made carts. Fine silverware was made of pewter while most was made of wood, at the time. Locksmithing required the use of forge and anvil. While good blacksmiths could make padlocks and simple rim locks, the locksmith also required the knowledge of lathe turning, spring tempering, rivet and screw making, precise fitting and hole punching. He made and repaired not only locks and keys, but also saddle mountings, small tools, hinges, screws, and gunstocks. So Shelley C.(above) is correct. The answers are 1. b., 2. e., 3. d., 4. c. %26amp; d., and 5. g.
Reply:1. E, sawmill operator
2. H locksmith
3. C, pewterer
4. C and D, glassmaker and pewterer
5. G, cartright
hope i passed! :P
Reply:e.g.d.c.g.
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
2.who provided colonist with building material?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
3.who turned valuable metal into items such as candlesticks,bowls platters coffee and teapots and sets of tableware?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
4.produced bottles, window panes and fine silverware?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
5.. who manufactured 2- wheeled used in farming and transporting freight?
a.trapper
b.cooper
c.glassmaker
d.pewterer
e.saw mill operator
f.innkeeper
g.cartwright
h.locksmith
Trivia put your knowledge to the test?
1)B Barrel maker
2)E
3)D
4)c%26amp;d
5)G
Reply:A cooper produced churns, tubs, casks, barrels, buckets, and pails, often made of cedar or pine. A cartwright made carts. Fine silverware was made of pewter while most was made of wood, at the time. Locksmithing required the use of forge and anvil. While good blacksmiths could make padlocks and simple rim locks, the locksmith also required the knowledge of lathe turning, spring tempering, rivet and screw making, precise fitting and hole punching. He made and repaired not only locks and keys, but also saddle mountings, small tools, hinges, screws, and gunstocks. So Shelley C.(above) is correct. The answers are 1. b., 2. e., 3. d., 4. c. %26amp; d., and 5. g.
Reply:1. E, sawmill operator
2. H locksmith
3. C, pewterer
4. C and D, glassmaker and pewterer
5. G, cartright
hope i passed! :P
Reply:e.g.d.c.g.
This is crazy?
my friend had told me about this but when you dial this number (1-216-333-1810) u hear a girl who calls the cops or somebody and theres a murder going on in a club its crazyyyyyyy i dont know if any of you have heard about this but if its a hoax tell me ..... but for those of you who wanna try call that number and wait till a woman voice comes on and shell say file accessed or somethin (you may have to try a few times b/c sometimes you get a male operator) i heard and its weird
This is crazy?
*stares at the cellphone
Reply:That sound creepy to me, but you should report this to someone
Reply:that is crepy where did you get that number
Reply:don't worry - i'll immediatly forward your post to the FBI. =)
This is crazy?
*stares at the cellphone
Reply:That sound creepy to me, but you should report this to someone
Reply:that is crepy where did you get that number
Reply:don't worry - i'll immediatly forward your post to the FBI. =)
Which of the following is least related to the others?
a) repressor
b) promoter
c)prion
d) regulatory gene
e)operator
Which of the following is least related to the others?
Prions cause disease but the rest are normal parts of a cell
Reply:D
b) promoter
c)prion
d) regulatory gene
e)operator
Which of the following is least related to the others?
Prions cause disease but the rest are normal parts of a cell
Reply:D
Which of the following does not consist of a sequence of bases?
a: repressor
b: structural gene
c:promoter
d:regulator gene
e:operator
Which of the following does not consist of a sequence of bases?
The answer to your question is repressor, all the other are in fact DNA sequences. The repressor is a protein that binds to DNA adjacent and downstream to the promoter sequence. The binding of the protein block the pathway for RNA polymerase and prevents transcription of the gene. Therefore the repressor negatively regulates gene expression.
Reply:I am going to go with repressor, all the rest are part of the DNA strand. A repressor is a protein that binds to the operator and hence made up of amino acids and not nitrogenous bases.
Reply:a repressor
gladiolus
b: structural gene
c:promoter
d:regulator gene
e:operator
Which of the following does not consist of a sequence of bases?
The answer to your question is repressor, all the other are in fact DNA sequences. The repressor is a protein that binds to DNA adjacent and downstream to the promoter sequence. The binding of the protein block the pathway for RNA polymerase and prevents transcription of the gene. Therefore the repressor negatively regulates gene expression.
Reply:I am going to go with repressor, all the rest are part of the DNA strand. A repressor is a protein that binds to the operator and hence made up of amino acids and not nitrogenous bases.
Reply:a repressor
gladiolus
A particular operon encodes enzymes that together manufacture an essential amino acid. If the regulation....?
of
this operon is like that of the trp operon,
A) the amino acid inactivates the repressor.
B) the enzymes produced are called inducible enzymes.
C) the repressor binds to the operator in the absence of the amino acid.
D) the amino acid acts as a corepressor.
E) the amino acid turns on enzyme synthesis
A particular operon encodes enzymes that together manufacture an essential amino acid. If the regulation....?
I'd like to use a life-line.
this operon is like that of the trp operon,
A) the amino acid inactivates the repressor.
B) the enzymes produced are called inducible enzymes.
C) the repressor binds to the operator in the absence of the amino acid.
D) the amino acid acts as a corepressor.
E) the amino acid turns on enzyme synthesis
A particular operon encodes enzymes that together manufacture an essential amino acid. If the regulation....?
I'd like to use a life-line.
A particular operon encodes enzymes that together manufacture an essential amino acid. If the regulation o?
11) A particular operon encodes enzymes that together manufacture an essential amino acid. If the regulation of
this operon is like that of the trp operon,
A) the amino acid inactivates the repressor.
B) the enzymes produced are called inducible enzymes.
C) the repressor binds to the operator in the absence of the amino acid.
D) the amino acid acts as a corepressor.
E) the amino acid turns on enzyme synthesis
CAN SOMEONE HELP?
A particular operon encodes enzymes that together manufacture an essential amino acid. If the regulation o?
D
like trp, it would bind the receptor so that both can bind the operator and repress trp operon function
this operon is like that of the trp operon,
A) the amino acid inactivates the repressor.
B) the enzymes produced are called inducible enzymes.
C) the repressor binds to the operator in the absence of the amino acid.
D) the amino acid acts as a corepressor.
E) the amino acid turns on enzyme synthesis
CAN SOMEONE HELP?
A particular operon encodes enzymes that together manufacture an essential amino acid. If the regulation o?
D
like trp, it would bind the receptor so that both can bind the operator and repress trp operon function
According to the operon model, for the synthesis of an inducible enzyme to occur, the...?
A. end product must not be in excess
B. substrate must bind to the enzyme
C. repressor must bind to the operator
D. repressor must not be synthesized
E. substrate must bind to the repressor
According to the operon model, for the synthesis of an inducible enzyme to occur, the...?
E. Lac operon: If lactose is absent from a cell the enzymes will not be made. If the sugar enters the cell, the operon will be switched on and produce the enzymes needed to digest the lactose.
Lactose metabolism in E. coli is programmed by the lac operon which has three structural genes. lac.Z codes for B-glactosidase which hydrolyzes lactose.
lac. Y codes for permease, a membrane protein that transports lactose into the cell, and lac A codes for transacetylase, an enzyme that has no known action in lactose metabolism. Lactose acts as an inducer to turn on the operon.
B. substrate must bind to the enzyme
C. repressor must bind to the operator
D. repressor must not be synthesized
E. substrate must bind to the repressor
According to the operon model, for the synthesis of an inducible enzyme to occur, the...?
E. Lac operon: If lactose is absent from a cell the enzymes will not be made. If the sugar enters the cell, the operon will be switched on and produce the enzymes needed to digest the lactose.
Lactose metabolism in E. coli is programmed by the lac operon which has three structural genes. lac.Z codes for B-glactosidase which hydrolyzes lactose.
lac. Y codes for permease, a membrane protein that transports lactose into the cell, and lac A codes for transacetylase, an enzyme that has no known action in lactose metabolism. Lactose acts as an inducer to turn on the operon.
What does An enzyme produced in response to the presence of a substrate called?
choices are as follows:
A.
An inducible enzyme.
B.
A repressible enzyme.
C.
A restriction enzyme.
D.
An operator.
E.
A promoter.
What does An enzyme produced in response to the presence of a substrate called?
A
narcissus
A.
An inducible enzyme.
B.
A repressible enzyme.
C.
A restriction enzyme.
D.
An operator.
E.
A promoter.
What does An enzyme produced in response to the presence of a substrate called?
A
narcissus
System software??
can any body give me any resource to get ss programs written in c/c++ like, dfa,scanner,LL parser, operator precedence, LR parser, recursive descent parser,toy compiler.....pls let me rply soon.
System software??
1) Get source code of Perl - its parser is based on Lex/YACC
2) Get ANTLR - it is different and more advanced technology used to build parsers, scanners and compilers based on C++ and Java. They have plenty of working examples.
System software??
1) Get source code of Perl - its parser is based on Lex/YACC
2) Get ANTLR - it is different and more advanced technology used to build parsers, scanners and compilers based on C++ and Java. They have plenty of working examples.
Synthesis of a repressible enzyme is stopped by?
A.
The allosteric transition.
B.
The substrate binding to the repressor.
C.
The corepressor binding to the operator.
D.
The corepressor-repressor binding to the operator.
E.
The end-product binding to the promoter.
Synthesis of a repressible enzyme is stopped by?
D. i think, i'm not 100% sure, because i'm actually only a high school student, and havne't actually taken a molecular bio course. repressors work by binding to operators. I'm not 100% what a corepressor is, but if they're anything like coenzymes, then they're just factors which are needed for the repressor to work, but will not work on its own. thus, the answer would be D and not C
statice
The allosteric transition.
B.
The substrate binding to the repressor.
C.
The corepressor binding to the operator.
D.
The corepressor-repressor binding to the operator.
E.
The end-product binding to the promoter.
Synthesis of a repressible enzyme is stopped by?
D. i think, i'm not 100% sure, because i'm actually only a high school student, and havne't actually taken a molecular bio course. repressors work by binding to operators. I'm not 100% what a corepressor is, but if they're anything like coenzymes, then they're just factors which are needed for the repressor to work, but will not work on its own. thus, the answer would be D and not C
statice
Biology Final will be the death of me... HELP!?
suppose the west nile virus is a class IV virus, that is, containing a single stranded (+) RNA what will be the first step in its infection?
a. it will be translated into some of the early proteins, including those necessary for RNA replication
b. it will be reverse transcribed into a double stranded RNA molecule
c. it will integrate into the host cell genome using a host cell primase
d. it will have its introns removed by a spliceosome
a particular operon produces enzymes that manufacture an importan amino acid one would hypothesize that
a. the amino acid inactivates the repressor
b. the enzymes produced are called inducible enzymes
c. the repressor binds to the operator in the absence of the amino acid
d. the amino acid acts as a corepressor
e. the amino acid "turns on" enzyme synthesis
all of the following are noncoding eukaryotic DNA except
a. introns
b. repetitive DNA
c. psuedogenes
d. promoters
e. rRNA genes
Biology Final will be the death of me... HELP!?
a
d
e
a. it will be translated into some of the early proteins, including those necessary for RNA replication
b. it will be reverse transcribed into a double stranded RNA molecule
c. it will integrate into the host cell genome using a host cell primase
d. it will have its introns removed by a spliceosome
a particular operon produces enzymes that manufacture an importan amino acid one would hypothesize that
a. the amino acid inactivates the repressor
b. the enzymes produced are called inducible enzymes
c. the repressor binds to the operator in the absence of the amino acid
d. the amino acid acts as a corepressor
e. the amino acid "turns on" enzyme synthesis
all of the following are noncoding eukaryotic DNA except
a. introns
b. repetitive DNA
c. psuedogenes
d. promoters
e. rRNA genes
Biology Final will be the death of me... HELP!?
a
d
e
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?Plz..?
1)What is the value of x after evaluating:
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+value"+coun...
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?Plz..?
These questions have a focus around one central theme... pre and post increment/decrement and I shall explain the difference here.
Pre-increment/decrement is when the variable in question begins with a ++ or -- and it means that the value held by the variable is increased/decreased by one BEFORE the variable is used.
If a = 1 then using ++a will mean...
"Take the value of a, add one, then use it in the expression"
Post increment/decrement is the exact opposite of this idea. It increases/decreases the value of the variable AFTER it is used. It is denoted by the ++ or -- after the variable's name.
If a = 1 then using a++ means....
"Take the value of a, use it first in the expression, then add one to it"
With this definition a few of your questions should be pretty darn easy. Like number 5 is pretty much answered. So is number four.... if a =4 then ++a will print 5 because it increments 4 FIRST then prints the value. a++ will print 4 THEN increment by one.
So if you just apply this rule to each of the questions, you will find it pretty easy really. Just break it down.
Hope this helps you out.
Reply:Does your teacher want to grade you or those who post answers to Yahoo?
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+value"+coun...
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?Plz..?
These questions have a focus around one central theme... pre and post increment/decrement and I shall explain the difference here.
Pre-increment/decrement is when the variable in question begins with a ++ or -- and it means that the value held by the variable is increased/decreased by one BEFORE the variable is used.
If a = 1 then using ++a will mean...
"Take the value of a, add one, then use it in the expression"
Post increment/decrement is the exact opposite of this idea. It increases/decreases the value of the variable AFTER it is used. It is denoted by the ++ or -- after the variable's name.
If a = 1 then using a++ means....
"Take the value of a, use it first in the expression, then add one to it"
With this definition a few of your questions should be pretty darn easy. Like number 5 is pretty much answered. So is number four.... if a =4 then ++a will print 5 because it increments 4 FIRST then prints the value. a++ will print 4 THEN increment by one.
So if you just apply this rule to each of the questions, you will find it pretty easy really. Just break it down.
Hope this helps you out.
Reply:Does your teacher want to grade you or those who post answers to Yahoo?
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?
1)What is the value of x after evaluating:
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+value"+coun...
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?
Why not type those up into short Java programs and just try them out?
public class prob1
{
public static void main(String[] args) {
int x = 3;
x += x+++-x+4;
System.out.println("x is " + x);
}
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+value"+coun...
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?
Why not type those up into short Java programs and just try them out?
public class prob1
{
public static void main(String[] args) {
int x = 3;
x += x+++-x+4;
System.out.println("x is " + x);
}
Can anyone plz help me in solving this java questions?
1)What is the value of x after evaluating:
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+val...
I'll be very thankful to you..
Can anyone plz help me in solving this java questions?
MATH, ACTIVITIES and FUN.
http://www.gcse.com/maths/mindex.htm?
http://www.sosmath.com/wwwsites.html
http://www.webmath.com/index.html
http://mathforum.org/dr.math/
http://www.tc.cornell.edu/Services/Educa...
Kindergarten to 8th Grade Interactive Sites
http://www.theproblemsite.com/math_games...
http://www.internet4classrooms.com/skill...
http://www.apples4theteacher.com/math.ht...
http://www.kidsolr.com/math/index.html
http://www.center.k12.mo.us/edtech/edm/4...
http://www.learningplanet.com/act/mayhem...
http://www.mathisfun.com/
http://www.sparknotes.com/math/
http://its.leesummit.k12.mo.us/studentsi...
http://springfieldpublicschoolsmo.org/de...
http://www.math.com/
MATH WEBSITES FOR TEACHERS AND STUDENTS
http://www.cumbavac.org/Math.htm
clematis
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+val...
I'll be very thankful to you..
Can anyone plz help me in solving this java questions?
MATH, ACTIVITIES and FUN.
http://www.gcse.com/maths/mindex.htm?
http://www.sosmath.com/wwwsites.html
http://www.webmath.com/index.html
http://mathforum.org/dr.math/
http://www.tc.cornell.edu/Services/Educa...
Kindergarten to 8th Grade Interactive Sites
http://www.theproblemsite.com/math_games...
http://www.internet4classrooms.com/skill...
http://www.apples4theteacher.com/math.ht...
http://www.kidsolr.com/math/index.html
http://www.center.k12.mo.us/edtech/edm/4...
http://www.learningplanet.com/act/mayhem...
http://www.mathisfun.com/
http://www.sparknotes.com/math/
http://its.leesummit.k12.mo.us/studentsi...
http://springfieldpublicschoolsmo.org/de...
http://www.math.com/
MATH WEBSITES FOR TEACHERS AND STUDENTS
http://www.cumbavac.org/Math.htm
clematis
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?
1)What is the value of x after evaluating:
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+value"+coun...
I'll be very thankful to you..
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?
Pained though I am to complete your homework for you, here are the answers (minus the explanation):
1. 13
2. 5.6, 16.5, 13.5, 11, 3.5 (assuming that you copied questions c and e incorrectly)
3. see http://java.sun.com/docs/books/tutorial/...
4. 5 and 4. See if you can tell the difference.
5. If you can't answer this, you're in the wrong class
6. It gives a compile-time error.
x+ =x+++--x+4;
if x=3,before the evaluation?
2)Evaluate the following Java expressions where a,b,c are integers and d,f are floating point numbers.
The value of a=5,b=3 and d=1.5 .
(a)f =a+b/a
(b)c=d*a+b
(c)c+(a++)*d+a
(d)f=(++b)*b-a
(e)c=a-(b++)*(__d)
3)Illustrate '?' operator.
4)What is the difference between post-increment and pre-increment?If a=4 gives values of ++a and a++.
5)What is the meaning of variable++?
6)What does the following program output to the monitor:
int value=0;
int value=1;
value=count++;
System.out.println("value"+value"+coun...
I'll be very thankful to you..
Can anyone help me in solving this java questions?
Pained though I am to complete your homework for you, here are the answers (minus the explanation):
1. 13
2. 5.6, 16.5, 13.5, 11, 3.5 (assuming that you copied questions c and e incorrectly)
3. see http://java.sun.com/docs/books/tutorial/...
4. 5 and 4. See if you can tell the difference.
5. If you can't answer this, you're in the wrong class
6. It gives a compile-time error.
Which of the following is true with respect to the lac operon?
a. the repressor only binds tothe operator when it is bound to the product of the enzymes coded for by the genes of the operon.
b. the repressor only bind to the operator when it is bound to the mRNA transcript of the lacZ and lacY genes.
c. the repressor only leaves the operator when it is bound to the protein product of the lacI gene.
d. the repressor is always bound to the operator, but changes shape when lactose bind to it allowing RNA polymerase to pass.
e. the repressor is bound to the operator, except when it is bound to the inducer.
Which of the following is true with respect to the lac operon?
d) is the most correct answer.
Reply:e
a by-product of beta-galactosidase activity is allolactose, a small amount of beta-galactosidase is always present, and when lactose enters the cell some of it is converted to te allolactose inducer, when the inducer binds to the repressor it cannot bind to to operator, this allows RNA POL to begin transcription (along with other factors) by binding to to the promoter, d cannot be correct because lactose is not the inducer of this system
b. the repressor only bind to the operator when it is bound to the mRNA transcript of the lacZ and lacY genes.
c. the repressor only leaves the operator when it is bound to the protein product of the lacI gene.
d. the repressor is always bound to the operator, but changes shape when lactose bind to it allowing RNA polymerase to pass.
e. the repressor is bound to the operator, except when it is bound to the inducer.
Which of the following is true with respect to the lac operon?
d) is the most correct answer.
Reply:e
a by-product of beta-galactosidase activity is allolactose, a small amount of beta-galactosidase is always present, and when lactose enters the cell some of it is converted to te allolactose inducer, when the inducer binds to the repressor it cannot bind to to operator, this allows RNA POL to begin transcription (along with other factors) by binding to to the promoter, d cannot be correct because lactose is not the inducer of this system
Computer Questions?
#1 The collection of programs that manages the activities of the computer system is known as
A. the master operator
B. the operating system
C. linking editor
D. the java compiler
E. a software suite
2#Which of the following hardware devices receives processed data?
A. an input device
B. an output device
C. the CPU
3#Magnetic tapes today are used primarily to
A. store data needed very fast.
B. back up other storage systems.
C. store data randomly.
D. store data produced by notebooks.
4# Input refers to the computer operation that
A. converts data into a format the user can understand
B. places data into a printer
C. process data
D. converts data into a format the computer can understand
Computer Questions?
1. B
2. B
3. B ?
4. D
Reply:1.E
2.B
3.C
4.D
Reply:#1 -%26gt; B
2# -%26gt; B
3# -%26gt; D
4# -%26gt; D
Reply:B,B,B,D
Reply:I think these r right....
#1...B
#2...C
#3...idk
#4...Aor D (they r the same)
Reply:1-b
2-b
3-b
4-d
Reply:1) B
2) B
3) B
4) D
Reply:b, b, b, d
A. the master operator
B. the operating system
C. linking editor
D. the java compiler
E. a software suite
2#Which of the following hardware devices receives processed data?
A. an input device
B. an output device
C. the CPU
3#Magnetic tapes today are used primarily to
A. store data needed very fast.
B. back up other storage systems.
C. store data randomly.
D. store data produced by notebooks.
4# Input refers to the computer operation that
A. converts data into a format the user can understand
B. places data into a printer
C. process data
D. converts data into a format the computer can understand
Computer Questions?
1. B
2. B
3. B ?
4. D
Reply:1.E
2.B
3.C
4.D
Reply:#1 -%26gt; B
2# -%26gt; B
3# -%26gt; D
4# -%26gt; D
Reply:B,B,B,D
Reply:I think these r right....
#1...B
#2...C
#3...idk
#4...Aor D (they r the same)
Reply:1-b
2-b
3-b
4-d
Reply:1) B
2) B
3) B
4) D
Reply:b, b, b, d
Plz write short answers for following. thanks?
a) Where do we initialize the ‘constant’ members?
b) How to call parameterized constructor of the base class?
c) What is the difference between C++ struct and C++ class?
d) What are the different ways to overload an operator?
e) Which operators cannot be overloaded in C++?
f) Can we access the non-virtual member functions of derived class using base class’s pointer/reference?
g) Can a pure virtual member function have its body defined?
h) If static member variable(s) are not initialized, then what type of error arises?
i) How to call parameterized constructor of the aggregated object?
j) Virtual Inheritance is used to solve the problem deadly diamond of death problem
Plz write short answers for following. thanks?
a) We are not doing your homework.
b) Don't even think about it.
c) How about you give it a shot.
d) If you keep doing this, your gonna fail.
e) Go read the book.
f) Or pay attention in class.
g) Stop being lazy.
h) How are we gonna help you on your test?
i) If these questions are on the test?
j) Go do your homework.
Reply:May be you can contact a programming expert at website like http://programming.aplis.net/ .
columbine
b) How to call parameterized constructor of the base class?
c) What is the difference between C++ struct and C++ class?
d) What are the different ways to overload an operator?
e) Which operators cannot be overloaded in C++?
f) Can we access the non-virtual member functions of derived class using base class’s pointer/reference?
g) Can a pure virtual member function have its body defined?
h) If static member variable(s) are not initialized, then what type of error arises?
i) How to call parameterized constructor of the aggregated object?
j) Virtual Inheritance is used to solve the problem deadly diamond of death problem
Plz write short answers for following. thanks?
a) We are not doing your homework.
b) Don't even think about it.
c) How about you give it a shot.
d) If you keep doing this, your gonna fail.
e) Go read the book.
f) Or pay attention in class.
g) Stop being lazy.
h) How are we gonna help you on your test?
i) If these questions are on the test?
j) Go do your homework.
Reply:May be you can contact a programming expert at website like http://programming.aplis.net/ .
columbine
Would you fire this guy? Joke!?
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support
employee. Now I know why they record these conversations!
Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a
sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I
type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get
out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Would you fire this guy? Joke!?
It's not MY fault that I thought the mouse was a foot petal.
Reply:that was funy
Reply:sounds like the same guy who thought his disk drive was a cup holder.
Reply:lol! Funny! 10!
Reply:Yes, just tad bit!
Reply:Cute but sadly so true, just last week my receptionist kept tell me the phone didn't work at her desk. She kept picking up the phone and getting no dial tone. Asked her to do do it three times before I couldn't hold in my smirk and pointed to the phone cord that she removed when cleaning. Sighhh guess it takes all kinds.
Reply:no need humor at times -that was funny
Reply:lmao
Reply:lmao good one, you get a star....keep them coming ;)
Reply:I used to work in customer support taking calls like this. It is so tempting to say stuff like this when you have to stop and explain how to copy and paste to 30 people in a row. We often wondered how these people managed to get on the Internet in the first place, let alone win an eBay auction and pay for it.
My brother used to work in tech support for a company and they would tell people that they have a ID10T (idiot) error and to call another number, tell them the error code and they would be able to help. Then give them the number of a coworker who would get the call and have to help them. At least the person knew when they started the call what it was going to be like.
Reply:That was too funny, I wouldn't fire him I would make him employee of the month!!!!!
employee. Now I know why they record these conversations!
Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a
sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I
type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get
out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Would you fire this guy? Joke!?
It's not MY fault that I thought the mouse was a foot petal.
Reply:that was funy
Reply:sounds like the same guy who thought his disk drive was a cup holder.
Reply:lol! Funny! 10!
Reply:Yes, just tad bit!
Reply:Cute but sadly so true, just last week my receptionist kept tell me the phone didn't work at her desk. She kept picking up the phone and getting no dial tone. Asked her to do do it three times before I couldn't hold in my smirk and pointed to the phone cord that she removed when cleaning. Sighhh guess it takes all kinds.
Reply:no need humor at times -that was funny
Reply:lmao
Reply:lmao good one, you get a star....keep them coming ;)
Reply:I used to work in customer support taking calls like this. It is so tempting to say stuff like this when you have to stop and explain how to copy and paste to 30 people in a row. We often wondered how these people managed to get on the Internet in the first place, let alone win an eBay auction and pay for it.
My brother used to work in tech support for a company and they would tell people that they have a ID10T (idiot) error and to call another number, tell them the error code and they would be able to help. Then give them the number of a coworker who would get the call and have to help them. At least the person knew when they started the call what it was going to be like.
Reply:That was too funny, I wouldn't fire him I would make him employee of the month!!!!!
Visual Basic Questions?
Could you please help me with the practice questions before the final exam. Thanks.
1. When defining a variable, the keyword ____ appears at the beginning of the statement.
a. Assign c. Define
b. Declare d. Dim
2. When defining a variable to be used to hold textual information containing multiple characters, the declaration statement should have ____ at the end of the statement.
a. As Char c. As String
b. As Char Type d. As String Type
3. A variable that will be used to hold only True or False values should be declared as a(n) ____ data type.
a. Boolean c. Integer
b. Decimal d. Single
4. A program whose interface will be a window on the screen of a computer running the Windows operating system, and which will allow the user to interact with the program by using this window, is created by selecting a ____ project in Visual Studio.
a. Web application c. Windows application
b. Console application d. Custom control
5. Properties can be displayed in the Properties window ____.
a. grouped by category or by the order they appear on the screen
b. grouped by category or sorted numerically
c. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by size
d. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6. The ____ sign is used in an assignment statement.
a. plus (+) c. ampersand (%26amp;)
b. equal (=) d. percent (%)
7. Which of the following is the correct general format for assigning a value to a property?
a. propertyvalue = propertyname.objectname
b. propertyvalue = objectname.property
c. propertyname.objectname = propertyvalue
d. objectname.property = propertyvalue
8. The ____ feature displays all allowable entries you can make in a Visual Basic statement each time a dot, equal sign, or other special character required for the statement is typed.
a. AutoComplete c. IntelliComplete
b. AutoSense d. IntelliSense
9. When you type the word ____ followed by a period in the code editor, IntelliSense displays a list of all the entries, including all the objects that can be specified in the statement.
a. Me c. MyForm
b. My d. VB
10. A(n) ____ is used for denoting a comment statement.
a. semi-colon (;) c. apostrophe (‘)
b. period (.) d. comma (,)
11. Comments are displayed (by default) with ____.
a. a green squiggly line c. blue text
b. green text d. a blue squiggly line
12. The ____ prefix is used for a Menu object.
a. menu c. mst
b. mns d. mnu
13. The ____ character is used to indicate that a letter is a hot key on a menu item.
a. ampersand (%26amp;) c. back slash (\)
b. forward slash (/) d. underscore (_)
14. The hot key for a menu item can be activated with the keyboard by pressing the ____ key and the hot key at the same time.
a. ALT c. CTRL
b. SHIFT d. TAB
15. The ____ object provides a text box that asks the user for input and provides an input area.
a. label c. textbox
b. menu d. Radio button
16. Which line of code will add the value “East” to a ListBox object named lstDirections?
a. lstDirections.Add(“East”) c. lstDir...
b. lstDirections.Items.Add(“East”) d. ...
17. To remove all objects from a ListBox object, the ____ method is used.
a. Clear c. Empty
b. Items.Clear d. Items.Empty
18. The ____ property of a ListBox object identifies which item in the ListBox was selected.
a. Item c. Selected
b. ItemSelected d. SelectedItem
19. The compound operator ____ adds the value of the right operand to the value of the left operand and stores the result in the left operand’s variable.
a. ++ c. =+
b. += d. ==
20. The compound operator ____ is used to add a string to an existing string.
a. %26amp;= c. %26amp;%26amp;
b. =%26amp; d. ==
21. The ____ follows the keyword For in a For...Next loop.
a. keyword Next c. keyword To
b. keyword Step d. a control variable name
22. A For...Next loop with a beginning value of 1, an ending value of 25, and a step value of 3 will execute ____ times.
a. 3 c. 9
b. 8 d. 25
23. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 16 Step 2
‘Body of Loop
Next
a. 3 c. 6
b. 4 d. 7
24. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 1 Step -2
‘Body of loop
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 10
25. What will be the value of the variable intTotalCount when the following code is executed?
For intOuterCount = 1 to 5
For intInnerCount = 1 to 4
intTotalCount +=1
Next
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 20
Visual Basic Questions?
1. dim
2. as string
3.boolean
4. Windows application
5.sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6.equal (=)
7.objectname.property = propertyvalue
8.AutoSensed.IntelliSense
9.Mec.MyForm
10.apostrophe (‘)
11.green text
12.mnu
13.underscore (_)
14.ALT
15.textbox
16.lstDirections.Add(“East”)c.l...
17.Clear
18.SelectedItem
19.+=
20.%26amp;=
21.keyword To
22.9
23.4
24.5
25.5
Hope this helps!!!
Reply:Sorry dude, try reading the book these are simple questions you should be able to answer easily.
Next time you try to cheat loser, don't ******* report me for telling you to read the damn book. If your that stupid, don't get into programming. Report It
Reply:While I certainly could answer all of these questions, your best bet would be to work it out for yourself and then to simply try each of them out in VB itself. You'll have better retention for the exam, if you've worked through each guess you got wrong.
It would not take very long to do that either, .5 - 1 hours total for the 25 questions.
1. When defining a variable, the keyword ____ appears at the beginning of the statement.
a. Assign c. Define
b. Declare d. Dim
2. When defining a variable to be used to hold textual information containing multiple characters, the declaration statement should have ____ at the end of the statement.
a. As Char c. As String
b. As Char Type d. As String Type
3. A variable that will be used to hold only True or False values should be declared as a(n) ____ data type.
a. Boolean c. Integer
b. Decimal d. Single
4. A program whose interface will be a window on the screen of a computer running the Windows operating system, and which will allow the user to interact with the program by using this window, is created by selecting a ____ project in Visual Studio.
a. Web application c. Windows application
b. Console application d. Custom control
5. Properties can be displayed in the Properties window ____.
a. grouped by category or by the order they appear on the screen
b. grouped by category or sorted numerically
c. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by size
d. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6. The ____ sign is used in an assignment statement.
a. plus (+) c. ampersand (%26amp;)
b. equal (=) d. percent (%)
7. Which of the following is the correct general format for assigning a value to a property?
a. propertyvalue = propertyname.objectname
b. propertyvalue = objectname.property
c. propertyname.objectname = propertyvalue
d. objectname.property = propertyvalue
8. The ____ feature displays all allowable entries you can make in a Visual Basic statement each time a dot, equal sign, or other special character required for the statement is typed.
a. AutoComplete c. IntelliComplete
b. AutoSense d. IntelliSense
9. When you type the word ____ followed by a period in the code editor, IntelliSense displays a list of all the entries, including all the objects that can be specified in the statement.
a. Me c. MyForm
b. My d. VB
10. A(n) ____ is used for denoting a comment statement.
a. semi-colon (;) c. apostrophe (‘)
b. period (.) d. comma (,)
11. Comments are displayed (by default) with ____.
a. a green squiggly line c. blue text
b. green text d. a blue squiggly line
12. The ____ prefix is used for a Menu object.
a. menu c. mst
b. mns d. mnu
13. The ____ character is used to indicate that a letter is a hot key on a menu item.
a. ampersand (%26amp;) c. back slash (\)
b. forward slash (/) d. underscore (_)
14. The hot key for a menu item can be activated with the keyboard by pressing the ____ key and the hot key at the same time.
a. ALT c. CTRL
b. SHIFT d. TAB
15. The ____ object provides a text box that asks the user for input and provides an input area.
a. label c. textbox
b. menu d. Radio button
16. Which line of code will add the value “East” to a ListBox object named lstDirections?
a. lstDirections.Add(“East”) c. lstDir...
b. lstDirections.Items.Add(“East”) d. ...
17. To remove all objects from a ListBox object, the ____ method is used.
a. Clear c. Empty
b. Items.Clear d. Items.Empty
18. The ____ property of a ListBox object identifies which item in the ListBox was selected.
a. Item c. Selected
b. ItemSelected d. SelectedItem
19. The compound operator ____ adds the value of the right operand to the value of the left operand and stores the result in the left operand’s variable.
a. ++ c. =+
b. += d. ==
20. The compound operator ____ is used to add a string to an existing string.
a. %26amp;= c. %26amp;%26amp;
b. =%26amp; d. ==
21. The ____ follows the keyword For in a For...Next loop.
a. keyword Next c. keyword To
b. keyword Step d. a control variable name
22. A For...Next loop with a beginning value of 1, an ending value of 25, and a step value of 3 will execute ____ times.
a. 3 c. 9
b. 8 d. 25
23. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 16 Step 2
‘Body of Loop
Next
a. 3 c. 6
b. 4 d. 7
24. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 1 Step -2
‘Body of loop
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 10
25. What will be the value of the variable intTotalCount when the following code is executed?
For intOuterCount = 1 to 5
For intInnerCount = 1 to 4
intTotalCount +=1
Next
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 20
Visual Basic Questions?
1. dim
2. as string
3.boolean
4. Windows application
5.sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6.equal (=)
7.objectname.property = propertyvalue
8.AutoSensed.IntelliSense
9.Mec.MyForm
10.apostrophe (‘)
11.green text
12.mnu
13.underscore (_)
14.ALT
15.textbox
16.lstDirections.Add(“East”)c.l...
17.Clear
18.SelectedItem
19.+=
20.%26amp;=
21.keyword To
22.9
23.4
24.5
25.5
Hope this helps!!!
Reply:Sorry dude, try reading the book these are simple questions you should be able to answer easily.
Next time you try to cheat loser, don't ******* report me for telling you to read the damn book. If your that stupid, don't get into programming. Report It
Reply:While I certainly could answer all of these questions, your best bet would be to work it out for yourself and then to simply try each of them out in VB itself. You'll have better retention for the exam, if you've worked through each guess you got wrong.
It would not take very long to do that either, .5 - 1 hours total for the 25 questions.
More call centre conversation..?
Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'
Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'
Operator: 'Went away?'
Caller: 'They disappeared.'
Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller: 'Nothing.'
Operator: 'Nothing??'
Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'
Caller: 'How do I tell?'
Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you it won't accept anything I type
More call centre conversation..?
yes ... funny ava star
Reply:k
Reply:they are great... thanks for the laugh !!
.star 4 U...!!
☆ ★ ☆ ★ ☆
.
Reply:Thats hilarious!! Best Laugh I've had for ages!! :-)
Reply:Great.
Reply:that caller reminds me of my mother...
Reply:Ya i like it
Reply:hahahahaha OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! star star star!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:Ha ha ha.!!!
More Excellent ones from you Sam.!!!
10/10 lady.!!!
Cheers for a smile.!!!
Reply:i totally agree!!! LOL
Reply:Ha Ha Ha......Im not sure about the last line, but yeah funny.
Reply:hahahaha!!!
very funny lol
thanks for the laugh.
Reply:funny, patience is a requirement of customer service
Reply:I'm working in a call center right now.......save me!!!
Reply:ha ha ha excellent,,,have a star,,,,
Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'
Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'
Operator: 'Went away?'
Caller: 'They disappeared.'
Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller: 'Nothing.'
Operator: 'Nothing??'
Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'
Caller: 'How do I tell?'
Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you it won't accept anything I type
More call centre conversation..?
yes ... funny ava star
Reply:k
Reply:they are great... thanks for the laugh !!
.star 4 U...!!
☆ ★ ☆ ★ ☆
.
Reply:Thats hilarious!! Best Laugh I've had for ages!! :-)
Reply:Great.
Reply:that caller reminds me of my mother...
Reply:Ya i like it
Reply:hahahahaha OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! star star star!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:Ha ha ha.!!!
More Excellent ones from you Sam.!!!
10/10 lady.!!!
Cheers for a smile.!!!
Reply:i totally agree!!! LOL
Reply:Ha Ha Ha......Im not sure about the last line, but yeah funny.
Reply:hahahaha!!!
very funny lol
thanks for the laugh.
Reply:funny, patience is a requirement of customer service
Reply:I'm working in a call center right now.......save me!!!
Reply:ha ha ha excellent,,,have a star,,,,
Visual Basic Questions?
I am practicing some multiple choice questions before my final exam, could you please help me out. Thanks.
When defining a variable, the keyword ____ appears at the beginning of the statement.
a. Assign c. Define
b. Declare d. Dim
2. When defining a variable to be used to hold textual information containing multiple characters, the declaration statement should have ____ at the end of the statement.
a. As Char c. As String
b. As Char Type d. As String Type
3. A variable that will be used to hold only True or False values should be declared as a(n) ____ data type.
a. Boolean c. Integer
b. Decimal d. Single
4. A program whose interface will be a window on the screen of a computer running the Windows operating system, and which will allow the user to interact with the program by using this window, is created by selecting a ____ project in Visual Studio.
a. Web application c. Windows application
b. Console application d. Custom control
5. Properties can be displayed in the Properties window ____.
a. grouped by category or by the order they appear on the screen
b. grouped by category or sorted numerically
c. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by size
d. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6. The ____ sign is used in an assignment statement.
a. plus (+) c. ampersand (%26amp;)
b. equal (=) d. percent (%)
7. Which of the following is the correct general format for assigning a value to a property?
a. propertyvalue = propertyname.objectname
b. propertyvalue = objectname.property
c. propertyname.objectname = propertyvalue
d. objectname.property = propertyvalue
8. The ____ feature displays all allowable entries you can make in a Visual Basic statement each time a dot, equal sign, or other special character required for the statement is typed.
a. AutoComplete c. IntelliComplete
b. AutoSense d. IntelliSense
9. When you type the word ____ followed by a period in the code editor, IntelliSense displays a list of all the entries, including all the objects that can be specified in the statement.
a. Me c. MyForm
b. My d. VB
10. A(n) ____ is used for denoting a comment statement.
a. semi-colon (;) c. apostrophe (‘)
b. period (.) d. comma (,)
11. Comments are displayed (by default) with ____.
a. a green squiggly line c. blue text
b. green text d. a blue squiggly line
12. The ____ prefix is used for a Menu object.
a. menu c. mst
b. mns d. mnu
13. The ____ character is used to indicate that a letter is a hot key on a menu item.
a. ampersand (%26amp;) c. back slash (\)
b. forward slash (/) d. underscore (_)
14. The hot key for a menu item can be activated with the keyboard by pressing the ____ key and the hot key at the same time.
a. ALT c. CTRL
b. SHIFT d. TAB
15. The ____ object provides a text box that asks the user for input and provides an input area.
a. label c. textbox
b. menu d. Radio button
16. Which line of code will add the value “East” to a ListBox object named lstDirections?
a. lstDirections.Add(“East”) c. lstDir...
b. lstDirections.Items.Add(“East”) d. ...
17. To remove all objects from a ListBox object, the ____ method is used.
a. Clear c. Empty
b. Items.Clear d. Items.Empty
18. The ____ property of a ListBox object identifies which item in the ListBox was selected.
a. Item c. Selected
b. ItemSelected d. SelectedItem
19. The compound operator ____ adds the value of the right operand to the value of the left operand and stores the result in the left operand’s variable.
a. ++ c. =+
b. += d. ==
20. The compound operator ____ is used to add a string to an existing string.
a. %26amp;= c. %26amp;%26amp;
b. =%26amp; d. ==
21. The ____ follows the keyword For in a For...Next loop.
a. keyword Next c. keyword To
b. keyword Step d. a control variable name
22. A For...Next loop with a beginning value of 1, an ending value of 25, and a step value of 3 will execute ____ times.
a. 3 c. 9
b. 8 d. 25
23. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 16 Step 2
‘Body of Loop
Next
a. 3 c. 6
b. 4 d. 7
24. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 1 Step -2
‘Body of loop
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 10
25. What will be the value of the variable intTotalCount when the following code is executed?
For intOuterCount = 1 to 5
For intInnerCount = 1 to 4
intTotalCount +=1
Next
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 20
Visual Basic Questions?
1. dim
2. as string
3.boolean
4. Windows application
5.sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6.equal (=)
7.objectname.property = propertyvalue
8.AutoSensed.IntelliSense
9.Mec.MyForm
10.apostrophe (‘)
11.green text
12.mnu
13.underscore (_)
14.ALT
15.textbox
16.lstDirections.Add(“East”)c....
17.Clear
18.SelectedItem
19.+=
20.%26amp;=
21.keyword To
22.9
23.4
24.5
25.5
Reply:Here are a few of them
1. d.
2. c.
3. a.
4. b.
5. d.
6. b.
7. d.
8. d.
9. b.
10. c.
11. b.
12. d.
13. a.
14. a.
15. c.
16.b.
17.b.
18.d.
19.b.
20.a
21.d.
22.c.
23.b.
24.b.
25.d
carnation
When defining a variable, the keyword ____ appears at the beginning of the statement.
a. Assign c. Define
b. Declare d. Dim
2. When defining a variable to be used to hold textual information containing multiple characters, the declaration statement should have ____ at the end of the statement.
a. As Char c. As String
b. As Char Type d. As String Type
3. A variable that will be used to hold only True or False values should be declared as a(n) ____ data type.
a. Boolean c. Integer
b. Decimal d. Single
4. A program whose interface will be a window on the screen of a computer running the Windows operating system, and which will allow the user to interact with the program by using this window, is created by selecting a ____ project in Visual Studio.
a. Web application c. Windows application
b. Console application d. Custom control
5. Properties can be displayed in the Properties window ____.
a. grouped by category or by the order they appear on the screen
b. grouped by category or sorted numerically
c. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by size
d. sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6. The ____ sign is used in an assignment statement.
a. plus (+) c. ampersand (%26amp;)
b. equal (=) d. percent (%)
7. Which of the following is the correct general format for assigning a value to a property?
a. propertyvalue = propertyname.objectname
b. propertyvalue = objectname.property
c. propertyname.objectname = propertyvalue
d. objectname.property = propertyvalue
8. The ____ feature displays all allowable entries you can make in a Visual Basic statement each time a dot, equal sign, or other special character required for the statement is typed.
a. AutoComplete c. IntelliComplete
b. AutoSense d. IntelliSense
9. When you type the word ____ followed by a period in the code editor, IntelliSense displays a list of all the entries, including all the objects that can be specified in the statement.
a. Me c. MyForm
b. My d. VB
10. A(n) ____ is used for denoting a comment statement.
a. semi-colon (;) c. apostrophe (‘)
b. period (.) d. comma (,)
11. Comments are displayed (by default) with ____.
a. a green squiggly line c. blue text
b. green text d. a blue squiggly line
12. The ____ prefix is used for a Menu object.
a. menu c. mst
b. mns d. mnu
13. The ____ character is used to indicate that a letter is a hot key on a menu item.
a. ampersand (%26amp;) c. back slash (\)
b. forward slash (/) d. underscore (_)
14. The hot key for a menu item can be activated with the keyboard by pressing the ____ key and the hot key at the same time.
a. ALT c. CTRL
b. SHIFT d. TAB
15. The ____ object provides a text box that asks the user for input and provides an input area.
a. label c. textbox
b. menu d. Radio button
16. Which line of code will add the value “East” to a ListBox object named lstDirections?
a. lstDirections.Add(“East”) c. lstDir...
b. lstDirections.Items.Add(“East”) d. ...
17. To remove all objects from a ListBox object, the ____ method is used.
a. Clear c. Empty
b. Items.Clear d. Items.Empty
18. The ____ property of a ListBox object identifies which item in the ListBox was selected.
a. Item c. Selected
b. ItemSelected d. SelectedItem
19. The compound operator ____ adds the value of the right operand to the value of the left operand and stores the result in the left operand’s variable.
a. ++ c. =+
b. += d. ==
20. The compound operator ____ is used to add a string to an existing string.
a. %26amp;= c. %26amp;%26amp;
b. =%26amp; d. ==
21. The ____ follows the keyword For in a For...Next loop.
a. keyword Next c. keyword To
b. keyword Step d. a control variable name
22. A For...Next loop with a beginning value of 1, an ending value of 25, and a step value of 3 will execute ____ times.
a. 3 c. 9
b. 8 d. 25
23. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 16 Step 2
‘Body of Loop
Next
a. 3 c. 6
b. 4 d. 7
24. How many times will the following loop execute?
For intCount = 10 To 1 Step -2
‘Body of loop
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 10
25. What will be the value of the variable intTotalCount when the following code is executed?
For intOuterCount = 1 to 5
For intInnerCount = 1 to 4
intTotalCount +=1
Next
Next
a. 4 c. 9
b. 5 d. 20
Visual Basic Questions?
1. dim
2. as string
3.boolean
4. Windows application
5.sorted alphabetically by name or grouped by category
6.equal (=)
7.objectname.property = propertyvalue
8.AutoSensed.IntelliSense
9.Mec.MyForm
10.apostrophe (‘)
11.green text
12.mnu
13.underscore (_)
14.ALT
15.textbox
16.lstDirections.Add(“East”)c....
17.Clear
18.SelectedItem
19.+=
20.%26amp;=
21.keyword To
22.9
23.4
24.5
25.5
Reply:Here are a few of them
1. d.
2. c.
3. a.
4. b.
5. d.
6. b.
7. d.
8. d.
9. b.
10. c.
11. b.
12. d.
13. a.
14. a.
15. c.
16.b.
17.b.
18.d.
19.b.
20.a
21.d.
22.c.
23.b.
24.b.
25.d
carnation
How to recharge vodaphone(chennai) by credit card?
i am in gulf and want to recharge vodaphone. is it possible to recharge by credit card (i dont have C.Card of india). Which operator is providing that service? Or is there any other way to recharge by credit card?
How to recharge vodaphone(chennai) by credit card?
Most of the banks offerings refill thru internet or using cards
key word is mobile refill. Try this for your bank in google
Check this site
Reply:these banks are providing service to who are having account with their bank. but want to refill by using credit card (gulf bank %26amp; not indian banks) Report It
How to recharge vodaphone(chennai) by credit card?
Most of the banks offerings refill thru internet or using cards
key word is mobile refill. Try this for your bank in google
Check this site
Reply:these banks are providing service to who are having account with their bank. but want to refill by using credit card (gulf bank %26amp; not indian banks) Report It
Put your knowledge to the test and get 10 points for best answer!!!?
who caugth fur- bearing animals for a living?
a.locksmith
b.cartwright
c.innkeeper
d.saw mill operator
e.pewterer
f.glassmaker
g.cooper
h.trapper
Put your knowledge to the test and get 10 points for best answer!!!?
H. Trapper because that's what trappers do. Can I please be picked as the best answer.
Reply:H. Trapper
Reply:h.trapper?
Reply:h.trapper
Reply:A trapper.
Trappers trap animals.....
Reply:a trapper catches animals for a living
Reply:H. Trapper
Reply:H: Trapper.
Reply:That would depend on the meaning of caugth. How's that ?
Reply:h
a.locksmith
b.cartwright
c.innkeeper
d.saw mill operator
e.pewterer
f.glassmaker
g.cooper
h.trapper
Put your knowledge to the test and get 10 points for best answer!!!?
H. Trapper because that's what trappers do. Can I please be picked as the best answer.
Reply:H. Trapper
Reply:h.trapper?
Reply:h.trapper
Reply:A trapper.
Trappers trap animals.....
Reply:a trapper catches animals for a living
Reply:H. Trapper
Reply:H: Trapper.
Reply:That would depend on the meaning of caugth. How's that ?
Reply:h
Apparently this is true?
There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for 'Termination without Cause'.
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!):
Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'
Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'
Operator: 'Went away?'
Caller: 'They disappeared.'
Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller: 'Nothing.'
Operator: 'Nothing??'
Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'
Caller: 'How do I tell?'
Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.'
Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
Caller: 'What's a monitor?'
Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'
Caller: 'I don't know.'
Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'
Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: 'Yes, it is.'
Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.'
Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'
Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.'
Caller: 'I can't reach.'
Operator: 'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??'
Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.'
Operator: 'Dark??'
Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller: 'I can't.'
Operator: 'No? Why not??'
Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'
Operator: 'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??'
Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'
Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'
Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??'
Operator: 'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!'
Apparently this is true?
Sadly enough, I know a guy with worse stories then that!!! aaaahhhhh technology. 8l
Reply:The Operator was right !!!
Reply:What an idiot.
Reply:HAHAHA! funny as!
Reply:haha thats ace! i'd probably say something very similar lol
Reply:Haha, that's great.
Reply:LMAO!!! loved it babe!!
XX
Reply:if this is a true story how did you get a hold of it? because the word perfect company wouldnt place this onto their website or leaflet customer care section..
im guessing you got this from a chain mail!!??
either way, i dont think its true.
how can someone that dumb get a job to begin with?
Reply:hahaha very funny! is it really a true story?
Reply:I used to do tech support for digital TV. People are unbelievably stupid.
Reply:i dont blame the guy you pricks go to college to make up words like"monitor" ect, isent computer good enough? like what the hell? it pisses me off when someone goes"oh im not a computer whiz!" when they can atleast use msn! no a person that cannot use a pc is uncappable of useing a pc.
Reply:pmsl......nice one!
Reply:ROFL!!! That's hysterical! Oh man, I love it. That poor person, though... How did they even figure out how to dial the phone to get the Help Desk?? lol
Reply:hahah funy
Reply:LOL
Reply:lmao this is funny, never heard it before
Reply:That is amazing,even i can use one haha lol :)
Reply:Lol if that's true I think we start a campaign to get that person a medal.
I think it is safe to say everyone who reads all that will know that problem, and wouldn't need to phone customer support for it.
Reply:Wow. That's crazy.
I don't know if it's true or not though.
Reply:brilliant, hehe what a d u m b a s s
Reply:Well they are damn stupid aren't they!
Reply:It's true???I feel pity for the caller....
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...
so funny...from where do get these stuff???
lol
Reply:lol... that is funny. I think the operator is on to something.
Reply:REALLY?
LOL
i didnt even read it. too ...... much ...... text......
sorry
Cya
ISABELLE :P :D
Reply:it is very true there are still people like that now a days.....
I had fun reading............
Reply:Sorrry No tm 2 read........
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!):
Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'
Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'
Operator: 'Went away?'
Caller: 'They disappeared.'
Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller: 'Nothing.'
Operator: 'Nothing??'
Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'
Caller: 'How do I tell?'
Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.'
Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
Caller: 'What's a monitor?'
Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'
Caller: 'I don't know.'
Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'
Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: 'Yes, it is.'
Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.'
Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'
Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.'
Caller: 'I can't reach.'
Operator: 'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??'
Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.'
Operator: 'Dark??'
Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller: 'I can't.'
Operator: 'No? Why not??'
Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'
Operator: 'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??'
Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'
Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'
Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??'
Operator: 'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!'
Apparently this is true?
Sadly enough, I know a guy with worse stories then that!!! aaaahhhhh technology. 8l
Reply:The Operator was right !!!
Reply:What an idiot.
Reply:HAHAHA! funny as!
Reply:haha thats ace! i'd probably say something very similar lol
Reply:Haha, that's great.
Reply:LMAO!!! loved it babe!!
XX
Reply:if this is a true story how did you get a hold of it? because the word perfect company wouldnt place this onto their website or leaflet customer care section..
im guessing you got this from a chain mail!!??
either way, i dont think its true.
how can someone that dumb get a job to begin with?
Reply:hahaha very funny! is it really a true story?
Reply:I used to do tech support for digital TV. People are unbelievably stupid.
Reply:i dont blame the guy you pricks go to college to make up words like"monitor" ect, isent computer good enough? like what the hell? it pisses me off when someone goes"oh im not a computer whiz!" when they can atleast use msn! no a person that cannot use a pc is uncappable of useing a pc.
Reply:pmsl......nice one!
Reply:ROFL!!! That's hysterical! Oh man, I love it. That poor person, though... How did they even figure out how to dial the phone to get the Help Desk?? lol
Reply:hahah funy
Reply:LOL
Reply:lmao this is funny, never heard it before
Reply:That is amazing,even i can use one haha lol :)
Reply:Lol if that's true I think we start a campaign to get that person a medal.
I think it is safe to say everyone who reads all that will know that problem, and wouldn't need to phone customer support for it.
Reply:Wow. That's crazy.
I don't know if it's true or not though.
Reply:brilliant, hehe what a d u m b a s s
Reply:Well they are damn stupid aren't they!
Reply:It's true???I feel pity for the caller....
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...
so funny...from where do get these stuff???
lol
Reply:lol... that is funny. I think the operator is on to something.
Reply:REALLY?
LOL
i didnt even read it. too ...... much ...... text......
sorry
Cya
ISABELLE :P :D
Reply:it is very true there are still people like that now a days.....
I had fun reading............
Reply:Sorrry No tm 2 read........
True telephone conversation!! whos this dumb?
There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a
%26gt;%26gt;long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is
%26gt;%26gt;a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a
%26gt;%26gt;recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the
%26gt;%26gt;Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word
%26gt;%26gt;Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".
%26gt;%26gt;Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I
%26gt;%26gt;know why they record these conversations!):
%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden
%26gt;%26gt;the words went away."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Went away?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "They disappeared."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Nothing."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Nothing??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "How do I tell?"
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
%26gt;%26gt;screen?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
%26gt;%26gt;anything I type."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "What's a monitor?"
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
%26gt;%26gt;TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "I don't know."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
%26gt;%26gt;where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes, I think so."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
%26gt;%26gt;plugged into the wall.
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes, it is."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
%26gt;%26gt;there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again
%26gt;%26gt;and find the other cable."
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Okay, here it is."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely
%26gt;%26gt;into the back of your computer."
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "I can't reach."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean
%26gt;%26gt;way over??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle -
%26gt;%26gt;it's because it's dark."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Dark??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I
%26gt;%26gt;have is coming in from the window.
%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;" Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "I can't."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "No? Why not??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got
%26gt;%26gt;it licked now.
%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer
%26gt;%26gt;came in??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it
%26gt;%26gt;up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you
%26gt;%26gt; Bought it from."
%26gt;%26gt; Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
%26gt;%26gt; Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
%26gt;%26gt; Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What
%26gt;%26gt;do I tell them??"
%26gt;%26gt; Operator: "Tell them you're too $*%ing stupid to own
%26gt;%26gt;a computer!!!!!
%26gt;%26gt;
True telephone conversation!! whos this dumb?
Whoa, that's long! ^_^
Reply:lol
Reply:LMAO that is great, i just gave teh big thumbs up!!
Reply:OHhhhh that was so good. I sure do hope that operator gets her job back. What an ******** that guy was.!!!!!!
Reply:Excellent, lmao !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:lmao, i love it!!!!
Reply:haha!
Reply:You can trust that anyone in retail or customer service would seriously back that guy up!!!
Reply:I'm on the operator's side! What an idiot the customer was!
Reply:haha that was funny..i hope the person gets their job back..although i bet once the courts listen to what happened they will agree and give the job back lol
Reply:very funny
Reply:ahhh, if only it was real
Reply:I guess he was fired for insulting a customer
but the customer sure was stupid!!
Reply:wow that is true. but i suppose you cant tell the customer that
Reply:Hahahahahahahahaha, that's funny!! I love these kinda things so thanx for sharing
Reply:OMG! Just shows how many stupid people are still in the world! That was funny!
Reply:LOl:):) :) :) :) :) :) :) :):) :) :) :):) :) :)
Reply:LMAO!!!!!!!
Reply:I would have done the same thing. "Hellooo you idiot, if there is a power failure, then your computer won't be on. DUMBASS"
Reply:I used to work for a major ISP Provider as one of their ISP techs, I remember when this actually happened, as during my training we listened to the actual conversation and died laughing. This happened in the year 1999. I hope the tech won, I never did find out how the lawsuit actually turned out though.
Reply:Brilliant! Thank you.
Reply:hahahahahahaha , that was very funny, but you would never believe just how many stupid people there are out there, as a manager myself I have seen no end of total stupidity from customers, its just completely amazing how thick they can actually be.
Reply:Awwww now that wasnt very nice....BUT REALL EFFIN FUNNIE! lol thanks for the laugh! lol
♥
pansy
%26gt;%26gt;long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is
%26gt;%26gt;a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a
%26gt;%26gt;recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the
%26gt;%26gt;Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word
%26gt;%26gt;Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".
%26gt;%26gt;Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I
%26gt;%26gt;know why they record these conversations!):
%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden
%26gt;%26gt;the words went away."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Went away?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "They disappeared."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Nothing."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Nothing??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "How do I tell?"
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
%26gt;%26gt;screen?"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
%26gt;%26gt;anything I type."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "What's a monitor?"
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
%26gt;%26gt;TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "I don't know."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
%26gt;%26gt;where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes, I think so."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
%26gt;%26gt;plugged into the wall.
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes, it is."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
%26gt;%26gt;there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again
%26gt;%26gt;and find the other cable."
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Okay, here it is."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely
%26gt;%26gt;into the back of your computer."
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "I can't reach."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean
%26gt;%26gt;way over??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle -
%26gt;%26gt;it's because it's dark."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Dark??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I
%26gt;%26gt;have is coming in from the window.
%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;" Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "I can't."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "No? Why not??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got
%26gt;%26gt;it licked now.
%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer
%26gt;%26gt;came in??"
%26gt;%26gt;Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
%26gt;%26gt;Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it
%26gt;%26gt;up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you
%26gt;%26gt; Bought it from."
%26gt;%26gt; Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
%26gt;%26gt; Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
%26gt;%26gt; Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What
%26gt;%26gt;do I tell them??"
%26gt;%26gt; Operator: "Tell them you're too $*%ing stupid to own
%26gt;%26gt;a computer!!!!!
%26gt;%26gt;
True telephone conversation!! whos this dumb?
Whoa, that's long! ^_^
Reply:lol
Reply:LMAO that is great, i just gave teh big thumbs up!!
Reply:OHhhhh that was so good. I sure do hope that operator gets her job back. What an ******** that guy was.!!!!!!
Reply:Excellent, lmao !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:lmao, i love it!!!!
Reply:haha!
Reply:You can trust that anyone in retail or customer service would seriously back that guy up!!!
Reply:I'm on the operator's side! What an idiot the customer was!
Reply:haha that was funny..i hope the person gets their job back..although i bet once the courts listen to what happened they will agree and give the job back lol
Reply:very funny
Reply:ahhh, if only it was real
Reply:I guess he was fired for insulting a customer
but the customer sure was stupid!!
Reply:wow that is true. but i suppose you cant tell the customer that
Reply:Hahahahahahahahaha, that's funny!! I love these kinda things so thanx for sharing
Reply:OMG! Just shows how many stupid people are still in the world! That was funny!
Reply:LOl:):) :) :) :) :) :) :) :):) :) :) :):) :) :)
Reply:LMAO!!!!!!!
Reply:I would have done the same thing. "Hellooo you idiot, if there is a power failure, then your computer won't be on. DUMBASS"
Reply:I used to work for a major ISP Provider as one of their ISP techs, I remember when this actually happened, as during my training we listened to the actual conversation and died laughing. This happened in the year 1999. I hope the tech won, I never did find out how the lawsuit actually turned out though.
Reply:Brilliant! Thank you.
Reply:hahahahahahaha , that was very funny, but you would never believe just how many stupid people there are out there, as a manager myself I have seen no end of total stupidity from customers, its just completely amazing how thick they can actually be.
Reply:Awwww now that wasnt very nice....BUT REALL EFFIN FUNNIE! lol thanks for the laugh! lol
♥
pansy
Which of these is NOT a component of the lac operon?
b. promoter only
c. regulatory gene only
d. operator only
e. promoter and operator
Which of these is NOT a component of the lac operon?
C, the regulatory gene. Although it exists of course, the gene coding for the repressor protein (the lacI gene) is not part of the operon--although it's nearby. Also, unlike the genes for the lac operon, is produced constitutively.
Reply:I agree with the answer above, however I don't always agree with the reference source attached. Wikipedia is full of bad information!
The lac operon needs both a promoter and an operator in order to carry out expression of the gene. A repressor will turn off the expression of the gene by binding to both the promoter and the operator.
Reply:The lac operon includes the promoter, regulatory, and operator.
c. regulatory gene only
d. operator only
e. promoter and operator
Which of these is NOT a component of the lac operon?
C, the regulatory gene. Although it exists of course, the gene coding for the repressor protein (the lacI gene) is not part of the operon--although it's nearby. Also, unlike the genes for the lac operon, is produced constitutively.
Reply:I agree with the answer above, however I don't always agree with the reference source attached. Wikipedia is full of bad information!
The lac operon needs both a promoter and an operator in order to carry out expression of the gene. A repressor will turn off the expression of the gene by binding to both the promoter and the operator.
Reply:The lac operon includes the promoter, regulatory, and operator.
The king of Idiot.....long joke....?
Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
" Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too f ---ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!"
The king of Idiot.....long joke....?
LOL, woowww
Reply:lmao,lol
Reply:It seems to be better service than Abbey National; but help desk computer assistance are not usually that helpful are they that would be far too complicated for them, that is why yahoo have us answers all the more difficult questions; so besides that what on earth is the joke, what do you find SO hilarious, and where one might ask does the stress lie, ugh%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; not really it was quite funny!!!
Reply:um oooook????
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
" Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too f ---ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!"
The king of Idiot.....long joke....?
LOL, woowww
Reply:lmao,lol
Reply:It seems to be better service than Abbey National; but help desk computer assistance are not usually that helpful are they that would be far too complicated for them, that is why yahoo have us answers all the more difficult questions; so besides that what on earth is the joke, what do you find SO hilarious, and where one might ask does the stress lie, ugh%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; not really it was quite funny!!!
Reply:um oooook????
Should this guy be fired?
This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause."
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!):
Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared"
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "OK. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then"
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!!!"
Should this guy be fired?
Thats the best laugh I've had in ages!!!
I'm actually in tears!!! Oh dear!!!
Reminds me of my colleague (who I think should be on pension). Whenever he recieves an email that needs a reply he prints it out and with a pen writes down the reply and places it on the senders desk!!!
Oi... I think the world is moving on too fast for some people. LOL!!!
Star for you!!!
Reply:lmao!
Out of all the funny tech support stories ive read, i think this one is one of the best! But the techie's right - the user is waaay too stupid to use a computer.
sea prompt?!! XD
I recently recieved a doc that listed all of the shortcuts for the computer, and decided to forward it to the secretaries and PAs here where i work. Later, i heard one of them couldnt find the "winky" (Windows Key) button! Not brilliant, but pretty funny when you think about it!
Reply:Lol!
Thats was good.
^_^
Reply:I agree with you, he should have been promoted.....ahahahahahahahahaha!
Reply:Haha - top stuff mate..
Reply:Ha Ha Ha Ha, one of the best jokes in a long time. Thank you for sharing this. It is too good not to pass on. Top stuff !!!!
Reply:Well that is customer service is for you at its best
I think it is the first time a customer wasn't F..Ked by customers service . THUMBS UP FOR THE OPERATOR
Reply:EXCELLENT....thank you so much....
Reply:Very funny but I think it is also an urban legend have seen this joke now for more than a year in my e mail. But he should have been promoted.
Reply:Lol shame poor guy!
Reply:Lol - die waarheid maak seer or the truth hurts
Reply:This too funny for words, but a couple of years ago it could have been me. I went to computer class to learn before I purchased and the first thing I was taught was the plug into the wall , then second is it turned on and third was check for power!!!! C-prompt was a sign that I lost the program and upon occasion I lost it!!! It makes you feel so smart. Try buying the computer professor 80.00 a whack thats what he could have used!!!!
Reply:Great joke, thanks for the laugh that made my colleagues think that I,m on some of the drugs that we discovered in a raid this morning!
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!):
Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared"
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "OK. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then"
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!!!"
Should this guy be fired?
Thats the best laugh I've had in ages!!!
I'm actually in tears!!! Oh dear!!!
Reminds me of my colleague (who I think should be on pension). Whenever he recieves an email that needs a reply he prints it out and with a pen writes down the reply and places it on the senders desk!!!
Oi... I think the world is moving on too fast for some people. LOL!!!
Star for you!!!
Reply:lmao!
Out of all the funny tech support stories ive read, i think this one is one of the best! But the techie's right - the user is waaay too stupid to use a computer.
sea prompt?!! XD
I recently recieved a doc that listed all of the shortcuts for the computer, and decided to forward it to the secretaries and PAs here where i work. Later, i heard one of them couldnt find the "winky" (Windows Key) button! Not brilliant, but pretty funny when you think about it!
Reply:Lol!
Thats was good.
^_^
Reply:I agree with you, he should have been promoted.....ahahahahahahahahaha!
Reply:Haha - top stuff mate..
Reply:Ha Ha Ha Ha, one of the best jokes in a long time. Thank you for sharing this. It is too good not to pass on. Top stuff !!!!
Reply:Well that is customer service is for you at its best
I think it is the first time a customer wasn't F..Ked by customers service . THUMBS UP FOR THE OPERATOR
Reply:EXCELLENT....thank you so much....
Reply:Very funny but I think it is also an urban legend have seen this joke now for more than a year in my e mail. But he should have been promoted.
Reply:Lol shame poor guy!
Reply:Lol - die waarheid maak seer or the truth hurts
Reply:This too funny for words, but a couple of years ago it could have been me. I went to computer class to learn before I purchased and the first thing I was taught was the plug into the wall , then second is it turned on and third was check for power!!!! C-prompt was a sign that I lost the program and upon occasion I lost it!!! It makes you feel so smart. Try buying the computer professor 80.00 a whack thats what he could have used!!!!
Reply:Great joke, thanks for the laugh that made my colleagues think that I,m on some of the drugs that we discovered in a raid this morning!
One for computer illiterates?
There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; without Cause".
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; (Now I know why they record these conversations!)
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; words went away."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Went away?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "They disappeared."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Nothing."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Nothing??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "How do I tell?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; screen?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; anything I type."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "What's a monitor?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "I don't know."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes, I think so."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; plugged into the wall.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes, it is."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; and find the other cable."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Okay, here it is."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; into the back of your computer."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "I can't reach."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; way over??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; because it's dark."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Dark??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; is coming in from the window."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "I can't."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "No? Why not??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "A power... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; your computer came in??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; bought it from."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Tell them you're too bloody stupid to own a computer.
One for computer illiterates?
%26gt;%26gt; Very funny...Hehee!.....
Ok, I'll shame facedly tell you what I did the very first week I had the internet connected.......I didn't know much about it at the time..........
I thought some malicious person was trying to access my PC remotely.....So, not knowing what else to do, I rang my ISP in a panic ~ I explained that I kept getting messages that my PC was trying to connect to a 'remote system'...........It turned out that it was my PC trying to connect to my ISP's system to get to the net.............
I heard a great guffawff of laughter being held in on the other end of the phone as the poor man tried to explain the basics to me........I was very red-faced by the time I hung up the phone.
Reply:funny sounds like my sister lol
Reply:Yes, that's good.
Reply:The operator should have gotten a raise in pay.
Reply:LOL some people are hard to help...LOL
Reply:Oh man, that was funny! Thanks for that!
Reply:Okay, so the employee was rude... but did that guy seriously not know how to use a computer? I think they're both at fault here, but he shouldn't have been fired, only reprimanded for being rude to a client. Unless it's happened before- then he should be fired.
Reply:made me LOL!
Reply:thats the best joke ive heard in a long time
Reply:Good one though long.
Reply:o my gosh that is sooo funny. i would love to meet the operater. cant stop laughing
Reply:OMG, that was hillarious.......i still cant stop laughing:)
Reply:The caller is probably blond. lol
Reply:Haaah . Good 1
Reply:That's hilarious!!!!
Reply:%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; Funny.
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; But the next time you copy and
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; paste a forwarded e-mail into
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; YA, do us the favor of removing
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; all those arrows.
Reply:lol love it!! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Reply:yeah, funny, but only mostly true - the "true" stuff ended with the tech's discovering that he was dealing with a user who was attempting to access a computer during a power outage. Everything from that point on is what he wished he could have said but wisely kept to himself.
Here's the tech's original post (http://www.progress.demon.co.uk/Fun/Trou... to alt.shenanigans:
From: dwiebe@csi.compuserve.com
Newsgroups: alt.shenanigans
Subject: Re: phonestuff
cyberknght@aol.com (CyberKnght) writes:
%26gt;I like that idea!
%26gt;
%26gt;When I worked as a customer service rep at the cable company, few things
%26gt;frustrated me more than vague customers.
%26gt;
%26gt;"Hi. My cable's not working right"
%26gt; [...]
%26gt;"How do I tell if my TV is on channel 3?"
%26gt;
%26gt;And on and on and on and on... this kind of call was typical of my day at
%26gt;the cable company
This reminds me of a call I got from a faculty member when I was
computer-assisting my way through college:
"Welch Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
[Instant voice-recognition: I know it's a particularly ditzy blonde French
professor with whom I have had prior dealings.]
"What sort of trouble, Dr. B?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went
away."
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
[Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.]
"Can you see the C:\%26gt; prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
[Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.]
"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
[Ah--at least she knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem.
I wonder if she's kicked out her monitor's power plug.]
"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
"What's a monitor?"
"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have
a little light that tells you when it's on?"
"I don't know."
"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord
goes into it. Can you see that?"
[sound of rustling and jostling]
[muffled] "Yes, I think so."
"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the
wall."
[pause]
"Yes, it is."
[Hmm. Well, that's interesting. I doubt she would have accidentally turned
it off, and I don't want to send her hunting for the power switch because
I don't know what kind of monitor she has and it's bound to have more than
one switch on it. Maybe the video cable is loose or something.]
"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two
cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
"No."
"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other
cable."
[rustle rustle]
[muffled] "Okay, here it is."
"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of
your computer."
[still muffled] "I can't reach."
"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
[clear again] "No."
"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle--it's because
it's dark."
"Dark?"
"Yes--the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming
in from the window."
"Well, turn on the office light then."
"I can't."
"No? Why not?"
"Because there's a power outage."
"A p--!"
[ARGH!]
This woman was good friends with my supervisor, who was also a French
professor (still is, matter of fact--and in addition, she's now also my wife),
so I couldn't deal with her the way I really wanted to, and was forced to
explain sweetly and gently to her that computers needed power just like office
lights, and if the office lights were out, then the computer was too, and that
yes, if she hadn't saved her work she had probably lost everything she'd done
so far in WordPerfect. But I could still fantasize:
"A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the
boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
"Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was
when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
"Really? Is it that bad?"
"Yes, I'm afraid it is."
"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
"Tell them you're TOO STUPID TO OWN A COMPUTER!"
[slam]
But that wouldn't have been a very nice thing to do, now would it?
Reply:LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
floral centerpieces
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; without Cause".
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; (Now I know why they record these conversations!)
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; words went away."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Went away?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "They disappeared."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Nothing."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Nothing??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "How do I tell?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; screen?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; anything I type."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "What's a monitor?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "I don't know."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes, I think so."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; plugged into the wall.
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes, it is."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; and find the other cable."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Okay, here it is."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; into the back of your computer."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "I can't reach."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "No."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; way over??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; because it's dark."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Dark??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; is coming in from the window."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "I can't."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "No? Why not??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "A power... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; your computer came in??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; bought it from."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt;
%26gt;%26gt; %26gt; Operator: "Tell them you're too bloody stupid to own a computer.
One for computer illiterates?
%26gt;%26gt; Very funny...Hehee!.....
Ok, I'll shame facedly tell you what I did the very first week I had the internet connected.......I didn't know much about it at the time..........
I thought some malicious person was trying to access my PC remotely.....So, not knowing what else to do, I rang my ISP in a panic ~ I explained that I kept getting messages that my PC was trying to connect to a 'remote system'...........It turned out that it was my PC trying to connect to my ISP's system to get to the net.............
I heard a great guffawff of laughter being held in on the other end of the phone as the poor man tried to explain the basics to me........I was very red-faced by the time I hung up the phone.
Reply:funny sounds like my sister lol
Reply:Yes, that's good.
Reply:The operator should have gotten a raise in pay.
Reply:LOL some people are hard to help...LOL
Reply:Oh man, that was funny! Thanks for that!
Reply:Okay, so the employee was rude... but did that guy seriously not know how to use a computer? I think they're both at fault here, but he shouldn't have been fired, only reprimanded for being rude to a client. Unless it's happened before- then he should be fired.
Reply:made me LOL!
Reply:thats the best joke ive heard in a long time
Reply:Good one though long.
Reply:o my gosh that is sooo funny. i would love to meet the operater. cant stop laughing
Reply:OMG, that was hillarious.......i still cant stop laughing:)
Reply:The caller is probably blond. lol
Reply:Haaah . Good 1
Reply:That's hilarious!!!!
Reply:%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; Funny.
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; But the next time you copy and
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; paste a forwarded e-mail into
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; YA, do us the favor of removing
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;
%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; all those arrows.
Reply:lol love it!! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Reply:yeah, funny, but only mostly true - the "true" stuff ended with the tech's discovering that he was dealing with a user who was attempting to access a computer during a power outage. Everything from that point on is what he wished he could have said but wisely kept to himself.
Here's the tech's original post (http://www.progress.demon.co.uk/Fun/Trou... to alt.shenanigans:
From: dwiebe@csi.compuserve.com
Newsgroups: alt.shenanigans
Subject: Re: phonestuff
cyberknght@aol.com (CyberKnght) writes:
%26gt;I like that idea!
%26gt;
%26gt;When I worked as a customer service rep at the cable company, few things
%26gt;frustrated me more than vague customers.
%26gt;
%26gt;"Hi. My cable's not working right"
%26gt; [...]
%26gt;"How do I tell if my TV is on channel 3?"
%26gt;
%26gt;And on and on and on and on... this kind of call was typical of my day at
%26gt;the cable company
This reminds me of a call I got from a faculty member when I was
computer-assisting my way through college:
"Welch Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
[Instant voice-recognition: I know it's a particularly ditzy blonde French
professor with whom I have had prior dealings.]
"What sort of trouble, Dr. B?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went
away."
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
[Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.]
"Can you see the C:\%26gt; prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
[Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.]
"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
[Ah--at least she knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem.
I wonder if she's kicked out her monitor's power plug.]
"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
"What's a monitor?"
"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have
a little light that tells you when it's on?"
"I don't know."
"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord
goes into it. Can you see that?"
[sound of rustling and jostling]
[muffled] "Yes, I think so."
"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the
wall."
[pause]
"Yes, it is."
[Hmm. Well, that's interesting. I doubt she would have accidentally turned
it off, and I don't want to send her hunting for the power switch because
I don't know what kind of monitor she has and it's bound to have more than
one switch on it. Maybe the video cable is loose or something.]
"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two
cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
"No."
"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other
cable."
[rustle rustle]
[muffled] "Okay, here it is."
"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of
your computer."
[still muffled] "I can't reach."
"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
[clear again] "No."
"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle--it's because
it's dark."
"Dark?"
"Yes--the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming
in from the window."
"Well, turn on the office light then."
"I can't."
"No? Why not?"
"Because there's a power outage."
"A p--!"
[ARGH!]
This woman was good friends with my supervisor, who was also a French
professor (still is, matter of fact--and in addition, she's now also my wife),
so I couldn't deal with her the way I really wanted to, and was forced to
explain sweetly and gently to her that computers needed power just like office
lights, and if the office lights were out, then the computer was too, and that
yes, if she hadn't saved her work she had probably lost everything she'd done
so far in WordPerfect. But I could still fantasize:
"A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the
boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
"Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was
when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
"Really? Is it that bad?"
"Yes, I'm afraid it is."
"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
"Tell them you're TOO STUPID TO OWN A COMPUTER!"
[slam]
But that wouldn't have been a very nice thing to do, now would it?
Reply:LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
floral centerpieces
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